Horses and tangarines

This last weekend was beautiful here in Ojai so we decided to head over to our friends ranch and enjoy walking thorugh their orange groves. There was an added bonus that our friends were taking their horses out, a treat for the Pepper who loves all things horsey right now.

Everything right now is related to big things and small things. Big things are mommies, little things are babies. It's very cute. So of course she wanted us to pick a mommy tangerine and a baby tangerine. She has started to want to dress herself so she picked her outfit. It's all about dresses right now which makes me regret buying all those practical t-shirts going unused in her closet. She also loves to wear both her bracelets and doesn't liek to leave the house without her hat.

Even though we spend a lot of time visiting our friend's horses this was the Pepper's first time on a horse! Look at that happy face. She was so thrilled. I hope we can do more of this for her.

The Pepper's current obsession: anything with wheels

Thankfully my little girl is still obsessed with her books but a new obsession recently emerged and I'm excited about it: cars! Actually, all things with wheels. This includes cars, trucks, bikes, and particularity motorcycles. She loves watching cars drive down the rode, she points out trucks or buses, and motorcycles are just fascinating to her. There is a restaurant here in Ojai called the Deer Lodge and it is a popular spot for motorcyclists because it's on a windy lovely road. It's become one of our favorite restaurants because it brings the Pepper so much entertainment. We walk outside and look at all the motorcycles and talk about the different colors and ornamentation. But the real fun is when the motorcyclists come out to leave. We watch them get their gear on and then wave to them as they vroom away. Exciting stuff! And the best part is that the motorcyclists get such a kick out of the Pepper's interest that they are so sweet and friendly and chatty and they play it up for her.

I'm happy about this new interest because I like that it's gender neutral. I guess you could even say it's considered more of a boy thing. But since I don't like to think to much in gender I like that this came into our lives. I've been thinking of gender and toys since we visited some new friends with a 2 year old boy the other week. He had a lot of cool things I wouldn't have thought to get for the Pepper, including some large plastic dinosaurs. And my little girl loved it all. It will help me think a little more "outside the box" when it's time to next upgrade her toys.

I also want to note hat motorcycles scare me. A lot. So while I support the Pepper's interest in them there is something about it that also worries me. My parents gave us a lot of freedom but there was one big thing on the "don't to it" list and that was ride motorcycles (we'd known too many tragedies). Flash forward and I ended up marrying a guy who used to work as a motorcycle courier. D grew up riding motorcycles with his dad so for him it was a normal part of life. This was a hidden side of him until a few years into our relationship. When I met D he didn't have a motorcycle but when he started his PhD he bought one to reduce his commute time and I almost had a heart attack. It seemed like death on wheels. But I had to get used to the idea and while his riding always worried me I got used to it and mostly just decided that I had to trust him to be as safe a driver as possible.

Hopefully the Pepper will grow up just appreciating the more dangerous hobbies from afar. Fingers crossed...

Image of the Pepper from this weekend. She loves this hand-me-down little car.

Recipes: current favorites

I realized that I haven't written about any favorite recipes recently and then I realized why: when we moved we had to give up our wonderful CSA. Without the deliveries of new and surprising fruits and veggies I haven't had to seek out and try new recipes. But the flip-side is that our produce deliveries have been replaced by trips to the local Farmer's Market. Ojai is an agricultural valley so you can imagine that the farmer's market here is pretty excellent. We love our new Sunday morning tradition of going to the farmer's market as a family. The Pepper is the sample queen and I even had her wear a bib around this last Sunday to sop up the berry juice she always has running down her chin as we walk around the stalls. And once we get the fruit home we seem to be enjoying it in it's pure form. I've been eating a lot more fruit just as is, and chopping up my veggies for a simple quick salad. This has meant I've been cooking fewer "recipes".

But, we did recently have some friends come visit us for the weekend and I wanted to cook everyone a nice dinner. There were two new things I did that were a huge hit:

Roasted Cauliflower & Chickpeas with Mustard and Parsley: This was all gone by the end of the meal. It's a great vegetarian side dish and my friend left with the recipe so she could make it at home.

Roasted Artichokes with Lemon & Garlic: This was the best artichoke I've ever made. I've boiled them before but never found them to be special or worth remaking. But the artichokes at the farmer's market looked so good I had to buy one. Turns out the secret is actually roasting them! I served it with some metled butter for dipping and even the 6 year old liked it.

Once we've settled in to our new routine more I want to get a bit more organized with my weekly meal planning and not rely so much on the usual quick throw-together dinners. But for now I'm just happy we have access to great produce and we're all enjoying the bounty that this valley has to offer.

Image of the Roasted Artichoke via.

We made it! (just barely)

We're in our new place in beautiful Ojai! And my assessment right now is that moving is stressful and we're exhausted. In retrospect I probably should have taken a day or two off of work. But wanting to maintain those precious vacation days we decided that D would handle the move while I worked and helped whenever I could. But this made the week completely non-stop. When I wasn't working or taking care of the Pepper I was unpacking or organizing or assembling. We unpacked the Pepper's things first which was the right call to make. But it meant that our things were in boxes for days which was a bit hard. I think there is an emotional toll taken to living out of boxes and feeling like things are chaotic and temporary. There is for me anyway. Plus there is just a lot of change happening and I think I haven't had time to process it. Moving out of downtown is a bug deal for our family, including all the repercussions like our little girl starting daycare. I find myself having emotions bubble up throughout the day but I don't have time to sit with them I have to move on to the next thing. I'm looking forward to having some time this weekend to reflecting on our life as it is now and processing all the feelings I have about it.

But there is a lot of good news too! We are so happy to be in such a beautiful place and in such a lovely home. We are lucky to be where we are. We're thrilled that the Pepper now has her own room which means we can finally talk in normal voices after she goes to bed. I'm so happy to have a dedicated office space where I can do my work. Our little girl seems very happy happy here too, and the transition into daycare is going better than we expected. And though this is a new town for us we already have great friends here who invite us to wonderful dinner parties and give us open invitations to use their pools.

We've definitely embarked on a new adventure, and like any adventure it is exciting and scary. Lots to take in. Lots to think about. But luckily, lots to enjoy.

Image from my Instagram. View from my new home office :)

It's happening faster than I thought

One of the things I was most intimidated by when I became a parent was the idea of potty training. I didn't understand how it could happen. I felt like it would take a lot of effort. I didn't know the best practices or the right way and it just seemed like it has to be very hard. Well, colored me surprised because it is happening faster than I could have imagined! So fast that we're not even ready for it.

Looking back we brought this on ourselves. I'm a big believer in naked baby time and we'd make sure the Pepper had time each day to run around in her birthday suit. Over time she started learning about how her body worked and would announce to us that she was going to the bathroom. Since we were starting to talk about it with her I decided to get the classic Once Upon a Potty book and it quickly became on of the most requested at story time. But my intention was to take things slow. She would start learning about the concepts and we could start talking about them and then when we're in the new house we could get her a little potty and leisurely make our way towards being diaper free.

What happened instead was that last week the Pepper decided she did not want to wear diapers anymore. We dealt with full-on tantrums every time we tried to get her changed. She demanded that she wear her pants without a diaper. She even asked to use the potty a couple times. And poor thing, we didn't have any of the needed tools. No potty. No underwear. No pull-ups. We were so not ready and with the move only days away we didn't want to get all set-up in a place we'd be leaving. So we struggled through it which meant a lot of clean-ups.

This last week was a challenging week with work and the move and the worse PMS of my life! Luckily we made it up to Ojai and into our new place (though there are still so many boxes to unpack). But the good news is we can finally unpack her potty. I have no idea what to expect. Maybe she'll just be curious about it, maybe she'll catch on quick and love it. But I have to say my little girl has impressed me. She was ready for this milestone much quicker than I was. Just a reminder that being a parent means constantly being adaptable.

Image of the Pepper from last week.

It's moving week!

It's moving week! You may remember from this post that we are going to do an experiment and move to the country. Things are a bit different than we had planned in terms of the logistics of renting our place and such, but we're moving forward with the relocation. We can only look ahead 6 months but that should be enough time for us to get our feet wet in a new town and see if it's something we can do long term. D has started bringing in boxes and today I'm going to start packing our things away and it's really exciting! I love the opportunity to go through our stuff and do a little purge. Moving is always a great opportunity to streamline :)

I'm feeling ready to have a break from downtown. Even though I've loved living here, lately I've been feeling much less comfortable. For example, over the last few weeks the number of sirens has at least doubled. This not only means a lot more disruptive noise but also just makes me wonder what all the emergencies are. It doesn't help there there was a scary incident just blocks form us recently. When the Pepper and I walked by a guy peeing on a tree in the middle of the afternoon the other day, I knew I was ready for a change.

But there are things I'm nervous about. Ojai is only a couple hours drive from LA and we are hoping our friends come to visit, but I'm nervous they won't. I'm anxious the commute will be hard on D. And I'm feeling worried about the transition to daycare for the Pepper. I know she will love the daycare. I think she's ready for it. And we feel really good about the place we've selected. But I just worry that the transition will be difficult for her. It will be very new. She's always had one of us around and has always been at home. She's such a happy and open little girl I don't want to change that. I don't want this transition to be scary for her or to make her distrust new things. D has agreed to spend some time next week with her at the daycare to help ease her in, and our wonderful friend and nanny will also visit during the week. So I'm hoping we have a good approach and we'll get over the hump successfully.

What has surprised me most about this move is the amount of new things we have to think about. We're moving from a loft to house and that means I need to get things like a baby monitor and child safety gates. And we need a lunch box for the Pepper to take to daycare and a chair or couch for the Pepper's room. We're trying to maintain our minimalist lifestyle but turns out living in a house requires a bit more stuff. I know there is more that I don't even realize I need so it will be a learning experience.

Onwards to new and exciting things!

Image via.

Finding mental space

This week has been a busy work week for me. There has been a lot of meetings and timelines and deadlines and items that we need to be moved forward. At this point in my career I'm good with organization and prioritization. I have my days organized with what I need to accomplish. I have the needed chucks of time set aside in my calendar. I know what needs to be done when and what can wait until next week. But I do struggle when I get to that point in a day when I feel fried; when my mind needs a rest and I'm having trouble putting thoughts together. And I don't have good solutions for how to take the needed break and reset. I like the idea of going someplace and sitting quietly without a screen in front of me. But living in a loft makes it hard to find space. Sometimes I like to cook but when it's a busy day I don't have time to take on a little kitchen project. Do I take a walk? Do I read a few pages in a book? Do I go to the couch and close my eyes for 5 minutes? When I'm burnt out it's hard to even know how to handle it. Normally I take a moment to stand up and put my head between my legs let the blood rush. It seems to help but it's not quite cutting it this week. I need a new approach.

I'm hoping that with our move to Ojai I'll be able to more easily step outside and look at a pretty view and recharge that way. But please send suggestions my way for how you take a moment to give your mind a break when it's reached a saturation point.

Image via.

We're going to do it!

I've mentioned it before but D and I have been thinking about the best place for us as our family grows. We love downtown and it's been a wonderful place to become parents. But we're growing out of our loft. I need a better space to work. D and I would like a bedroom all our own. And it would be nice to have more outdoor space for the Pepper to run around in.

So we're going to try something! This summer we're are going to move to Ojai. Yup, we're going to make a change. But we know it's a big enough change that it's worth us doing a little test run. We're going rent out our place and rent a place up there and see how the first year goes. The biggest challenge with the move will be that D will need to do the 2-hour drive to LA a few times a week. Not ideal. But we also don't know how often he will need to do it. And we're hoping the benefits of living in a beautiful nature-oriented place will be worth it.

Right now the most exciting thing to me is the Ojai daycare we've chosen for the little one. It has so much wonderful outdoor space. And with that space they are able to have a little garden where they grow vegetables. Plus they have animals there! They have goats, chickens, rabbits, tortoises, and a baby mini-pig and the kids get to play and help take care of the animals. So wonderful. And there is no wait-list! Such a change from Los Angeles.

I'm anxious about the move. The logistics will be a lot to deal with though luckily D has offered to take point with a lot of that stuff. I also know I am going to miss a lot of things about our life right now. I will miss the loft that we worked so hard to get just right. I will miss being able to walk everywhere. I will really miss being located so close to a lot of our friends. 

But, it's on to a new adventure! Fingers crossed that it all works out.

Image from my Instagram of our last trip to Ojai.

Mini-break!

This weekend D and I took The Pepper up to Ojai for one night. Ojai is just a little north of Los Angeles so it's a short 1.5 hour drive, but it's a totally different scene. It's an agricultural valley and it's all about horses and hiking and it's a wonderful change from our urban life. Even though it's just a weekend, it's recharging to leave our usual pace and do something different. I think changing scenery is good for the soul.

I'm always thinking about how to integrate travel into our lives. If you work in the US you are familiar with the usual 10 vacation-days most companies give. And if you don't live near your family, this really isn't a lot of time off. For us, it means that if D and I want to visit his family in Michigan it's hard to plan any other significant travel that same year. You throw in something like a wedding we need to travel for and any real vacation is out of the question. But getting away is so important! One thing we've therefore tried to do over the last year is take little mini-breaks. Sometimes it will mean I take a Friday off, but even if I don't just a weekend in a different location can give me a little energy surge. I think there is just the mental and emotional impact of experiencing something different, but there is also the escape from the trappings of the tediums of home life. It's nice to get away from the laundry or the house cleaning that sits over my head when I'm home. It's easier to be present on the moment if I'm taken out of my routines. While I hope we can take a longer trip this year, we're going to keep getting away whenever we can. Currently on my list of weekend trips: wine tasting in Santa Ynez.

Image from our weekend trip up to Ojai.

Fantasy lives

I was recently reading about the best places to live (if you define "best" as the places people are happiest) and my imagination started running. My husband will tell you that I have many fantasies about living places other than Los Angeles. I love LA, and it is pretty awesome. A few weeks back I was having lunch with D and a friend of ours who is originally from England but has been in the US for decades now. The subject of my pining to relocate came up and our dear friend's response was "why?". He pointed out that we have a wonderful home and a great set-up and a fun lifestyle that seems to suit us. He loves LA, D loves LA, we have family here, so why would we move? I pointed out that I was the only one at the table who has not yet had the opportunity to move away from home (D is from Michigan originally). I understand where they are coming from, but I still have a yearning to try out one of the lives in my imagination.

I fantasize about living in France, specifically Paris or a suburb of Paris. I like their apparent approach to parenting and feel like their culture would suit how we live. I like their emphasis on good quality food and cooking at home. I appreciate their approach to education, especially for young children. Plus I think it's everyone's romantic notion to live in France one day. If we lived there I imagine us baking pastries at home on the weekends, drinking wine at cafes in the evenings, and enjoying walking around the beautiful city.

I fantasize about living in one of the Scandinavian countries. I feel they have a better work life balance, possibly because of all the help from the government. I like the idea of having healthcare and education taken care of. Plus the expectations for time taken off of work each year is much more than the US, this includes taking time off for maternity and paternity leave. If we lived in Norway or Sweden I would imagine we'd have a well designed and functional home, we'd travel and have more quality family time together, and we'd spend a lot of time on bikes.

On of my more realistic fantasies is moving about 80 miles north to Ojai, an agricultural valley just a little south of Santa Barbara. Not only is it beautiful up there, it's small and quaint which would be a nice change from the city. And the culture is built around farming so there are lots of people with animals like horses and goats. There are fabulous hikes and amazing local produce. They have great public schools and some very fancy private schools. Best part is that even though it's sort of remote it's driving distance to Los Angeles, Santa Barbara, and Ventura. If we lived there I imagine the Pepper taking horse back riding lessons, visiting the farmers market every Sunday, and spending lots of time outdoors.

The thing about fantasy is that you don't think about the drawbacks. Of course anywhere we live will have it's good and bad sides. But part of my desire to move it to see if I like the change or if it makes me realize that Los Angeles really is the place for me. We'll see.

Image via.